Friday, September 17, 2010

No, I don't want to be your facebook friend.

So here I am, sitting in my hovel of a room in employee housing (my lease ended, don't ask) and have nothing really better to do than blog surf and facebook stalk. I've done so much facebook stalking that I have gotten frustrated with myself and have begun un-friending people.
I know that many people have this sentiment already: facebook is an all too present influence in our lives, which it is. Remember when we first got facebook, and it was like a competition to see how many friends you could have? Entering my freshman year of college I would get five or ten people a day I didn't know "friending" me simply because we were entering the college at the same time. But now I look at people who have eight hundred, nine hundred, even a thousand friends and I wonder how they have so many--or, even why they would want so many. I realized that it was because they would meet a person ONE TIME and friend them on facebook. And these people didn't say no because, let's face it, it's kind of awkward to say no. But then, there always comes that friend request: the person you know you're only going to know for a certain amount of time, the friend of a friend you met once, that guy who hit on you at that party your cousin threw, and you think to yourself: I don't really want to be your facebook friend.

So let's maybe follow some sort of etiquette. Here are some general guidelines:
1. If we met once, don't friend me. Especially if we were drunk during this meeting.
2. If we don't really ever have a chance of seeing each other again, don't friend me.
3. If you're dating my ex-boyfriend, or I'm dating your ex-boyfriend, don't friend me.
4. If we maybe kind of knew each other in high school, but didn't run in the same circles, don't friend me. It's been four years. I probably won't even see you at reunions (because there's a slim chance of my attendance, but more on that later)
5. if we happen to be tagged in a picture together, but we aren't friends in real life, don't friend me.

Simple enough, right? Don't be offended if people unfriend you. After all, what do I care what the townie chicks I went to high school with are doing anyway? I almost don't even care about some of the people I went to college with.


  1. augh I completely agree with this list! I've had the same 50 year old man (creepy, I know) from my hometown friend me TWICE. I denied him both times. Just because we have some friends in common and we come from the same town (which has less than 3,000 residents but still!) doesn't mean I know you...which means I will NOT be your friend.

  2. LOVE this. I feel a huge need to defriend HALF my fb friends because of your list. Haha. Thanks for the inspiration :)